Holding Back
by UnknownTitans
Summary: ONESHOT - Robin has always had a special relationship with Starfire that he has never truly been able to understand. Maybe it's time for him to stop holding back and take the plunge.


I don't know how it always seems to end up like this, we will all be watching a movie together and slowly the others would separate off to their sleeping quarters, but it would always leave the 2 of us here. We seem to be the only ones that can make it through at this time of night or we just decided to watch another. It's funny though; neither of us ever seems to be that invested with the movies in the first place. You had fallen asleep about an hour into the second movie and my attention to the movie had been torn away as you rested your head upon my shoulder and had wound your arms around me and drifted off into slumber.

I have never fully been able to understand the relationship we have shared; it never has really been a normal friendship. Friends don't sit up on the rooftop until the sun rises talking about anything and everything. Friends don't put themselves in complete danger just to save the other. I would suppose it is because we are best friends but I have known for a while that it surpasses even that. Best friends don't watch movies until the middle of the night 'cuddling', which to any onlooker; is what we would appear to be currently doing. You have always been special to me and I really just wish that I could put words to how I feel about you.

The other Titans know exactly how I feel about you and have known since day one, regardless of how much I try to dissuade them in a pathetic attempt to withhold my dignity and appear strong. Raven knew the first time we all met that I felt something special about you; I guess telepathy has its upsides doesn't it? Cyborg seemed to be the next deviant to work it out. Whenever me and you were sitting together or talking or just smiling at each other, Cyborg would always give me his signature knowing smirk from across the room. Beast Boy had been a little slow but soon joined in with Cyborg's grins and encouraging smirks.

Up until tonight I hid behind my list of reasons why we couldn't just be together. Up until tonight the others had never intervened but their patience with me had seemed to dwindle and they took it upon themselves to put an end to it.

* * *

 _A series of knocks appeared at the door followed by the voices of Raven and Cyborg requesting that he open the door._

 _He trudged over to the door and opened it with a questioning glance "What's up guys?"_

" _We need to speak to you Rob" Cyborg said pushing past him and stepping over next to his bed_

 _He gave a questioning glance to Raven but she simply gestured for him to listen "Okay?" He replied sitting down on my bed._

" _You need to tell Starfire how you feel about her" Raven stated simply_

 _Feigning ignorance seemed to be a good exit from this topic "Excuse me?"_

" _You heard her Rob, and don't try to pull any of that 'I don't know what you're talking about' bullshit because we know that you understand perfectly" he paused "we're tired of letting you play this little game of swooning over her whenever she is near you but then the second one of us mentions it you act as if you have never heard of her"_

" _Okay, fair enough. I like her. That a good enough response for you?" He replied_

" _I think it's a lot more than simply liking her. We all like Star, but you Rob, love's hit you like a brick to the face" Cyborg grinned_

" _Our point is Robin. It's that it's clear to all of us except for Star how you feel about her but yet you won't do anything about it. She won't be here forever Robin so you should do something whilst you still can" Raven stated to which Cyborg nodded in agreement_

" _There's reasons I can't do anything about it guys" He paused, sighing deeply "I want to, badly, but I think me and Star being together would do more harm than good"_

 _Both of them looked at him with raised, questioning eyebrows "You're kidding right?" Cyborg asked with slight concern "How could you dating Star be bad?"_

 _He really didn't want to have to go over this with them after he had already spent so long arguing it over in his head "I don't really want to talk about this, guys"_

" _We want to know Robin" Raven stated sternly "if the reasons are good enough then surely you can tell us can't you?"_

 _Fine. If they want to know, they can know he thought "What if she gets hurt?" He paused whilst the two stared at him in confusion "What if someone like Mad Mod or Killer Moth or anyone targets her to get to me? I'd never be able to cope if someone hurt her to get to me…" He said sadly_

" _Starfire is a tough one Rob. Our girl can handle herself" he stated reassuringly patting him on the shoulder_

" _Cyborgs right Robin. You can't just not do things just because there is a chance it could turn out badly. Any freak could pick on her for whatever reason, regardless of it being to do with you" Raven stated "Now how about you give us an actual reason?"_

 _Robin sighed deeply "What-what if I hurt her?" he paused thinking "What if I yell at her or ignore her when I am busy. I couldn't bear to think that I would be hurting here but what if I'm right?"_

" _Woah-woah-woah man" Cyborg replied "you're selling yourself way too short here Rob" he said sitting next to him on the bed and placing his hand comfortingly on his shoulder "I've never seen anyone who is as kind and helpful to Star as you are man"_

" _You will literally spend hours explaining things to her, just because you want her to be happy. You don't do that kind of stuff for people who you would hurt" Raven added with a smile_

" _Yeah I guess you're right" he paused with a smile before it slowly turned into one of sadness again "you haven't thought about the idea that she might not like me back"_

 _Raven and Cyborg turned to each other and grinned "Oh I really don't think you will have to worry about that, man" Cyborg stared with a grin_

" _Really? How can you be sure?" he asked in confusion. Raven tapped a finger to her temple in response. "Isn't it wrong to tell someone what someone else is thinking?" he asked guiltily_

" _Normally it would be. But you two have been infuriating. That's why we're telling you this in the first place" Raven replied_

" _Okay. But if Starfire likes me as well then why hasn't she said anything to me?" he asked sadly_

" _For the same reason you haven't said anything to her. You're both too chicken to actually say anything" Cyborg answered with a chuckle "Listen Rob. The only reason we are telling you this is because we want you to be happy and so we decided that you needed a little shove in the right direction" he paused patting his shoulder and heading towards to door "tell her when you're ready man, but do us all a favour and just get to together already man" he said with a grin "You've been holding back for far too long"_

* * *

It seems that your head has fallen from my shoulder and is now laid against my chest with your arms tucked around my sides. You look so adorable when you sleep, that same cheerful smile is always plastered on your face as if every dream you have is always full of happiness. I know that your past is definitely not one that would inspire happiness and cheer and that is one of the many reasons that I admire you as much as I do. Your past dwarfs mine in darkness but yet you still shine brighter than any Sun in any galaxy ever could. I grew up in the darkness and have stayed in it all my life until we met, you allowed me to see that without darkness there can be no light and I have embraced it ever since.

I keep subconsciously stroking your hair and I keep telling myself to stop, It seems wrong as if I am somehow taking advantage of you whilst you sleep. However my hands have decided to do so anyway and by the wide smile on your face it doesn't look like it is causing you any issue.

There are so many things I want to tell you Star, so many things I should have told you months ago but I have always been too afraid. Tonight I managed to pass barriers that have allowed me to see how right it would be if we were together but yet I still can't find the courage to tell you. I'd love to tell you how beautiful you are and how grateful I am that you are here with me. The idea that you share some level of feelings for me baffles me beyond belief. The alien princess and rightful queen of a far off world chose me to be her friend and it seems as something more than a friend.

I could tell anything to you in this state, centuries old promises could spill from my mouth at the simple cost of a smile from you. Maybe if not when you are awake, maybe I can tell you how I feel whilst you slumber. "I love you so much Star" I say warmly. Maybe one day soon I will be able to tell you real but for now this will do.

And then to my complete surprise you look up at with those emerald pools and melt my heart in 5 words "and I love you Robin" she replies, her bright smile still radiating through her tired composure. She leans up and kisses me lightly on the lips before returning her head to my chest and snuggles in closer. My smile could rival even the might of Starfire's as I sigh happily and wrap my arms around the girl and join her in peaceful slumber.

Cyborg was right, I have been holding back too long. Far, far too long.

 **The End**

* * *

 **Author's Notes:**

Hope you all enjoyed this one-shot. There aren't many of my stories that I would outright compliment myself for but I am really proud of myself with this one.

This one was wrote completely in Robin's perspective which is something relatively new for me. I will most likely write more stories in this forced perspective as it makes for more interesting story telling.

Plenty more one-shots like this will be coming in the future as I have tons of ideas for them but if you would like a specific idea that you have thought of, being made into a story then please send it me via private message on the site or even just leave a review on a story and I will see it.

 **Next Story: "Losing Her"** – A more angst driven story

Thinking about writing a part 3 to the recovery series so that could be good

Also I'm going to try and come up with some more main focused angst stories. I seem to be really active in writing fluff but I would like to try and write some darker stories. However these stories will still include some fluff in them so if that's your thing then don't panic.


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